For days last week, I was so upset. Josiah began saying, "I'm not special..." and I had no idea why. He looked very sad when he said it, yet confused when I tried to tell him how special he really is. I try to tell him this every day, and make him feel special in every way I can. I was worried that he might be depressed, and was trying to think of something that may have happened to make him feel this way. About three or four days into this (and lots of tears later from me), he said, "I'm not special..." but this time he kept going, and he recited an entire scene from a Veggie Tales movie that he loves to watch. He played all the parts, including facial expressions. I was so relieved, and entertained! I should have known better with the strong acting gene in the family!
As every parent does, I feel so bad when I am impatient or harsher than I needed to be in the moment. Every once in a while, Josiah says, "Not speak rudely, Mommy," as he wags his little finger at me. This has often made me upset, and sometimes angry, because he is right. I am trying to teach him how to speak to others, and I am one of his biggest examples so I should be a good one; however there is something very humbling and infuriating about being called out by a two-year-old. As we were discussing it this week, a friend told me that she felt it was a very positive thing that Josiah felt the freedom and safety in our relationship to call me on things like that. This tiny perspective change made me feel more joyful about this recurrence. I will make lots of mistakes, and it is even healthy for my kids to see this, as long as I take their words to heart when I have wronged them and am big enough to apologize.
It's funny sometimes how a shift in perspective, or a little more information can make such a difference!
1 comment:
It's so true. I actually find that children learn so much from us being able to apologize to them. It is such an important lesson for them, and to show it by example is priceless. Also, we show we aren't perfect, and that they love us this way anyway, and so we love them, imperfections and all. :)
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